Men, we have a big calling with big shoes to fill.
One Sunday in June we set aside a day to mark one of the two most important roles that can be played in parenting, the father. This day is a day where we look to and honor the men who raised us and honor the office of fatherhood. Men, God has placed a high calling on your life and it is important that you fulfill your moral responsibility. Women, I know that there are many voices out there (in the world and the church) that are minimizing the role of fatherhood in our society, but you cannot buy into that ungodly way of thinking. If we deviate from God’s plan for marriage and the family, we are living and thinking ungodly. Fathering is not something that just anyone can do; there are some signature features that all dads must have. This role is of foundational importance, and we must not marginalize or denigrate that role.
I am thoroughly convinced that the foundation of civilization is embedded within the most basic unit of society: the family. Which is one man, and one woman, married, bound together for life. When we minimize the significance of one of those roles or attempt to recreate what God has designed in alternative ways, we are building upon a broken foundation. If you look at our churches today, I believe it is evident that we have a broken foundation. If you look at our country, I believe we can all see a broken foundation. We could blame many people for that brokenness: we can blame the feminists, we could blame the media, we could blame women in general, or we can blame schools for being designed and modified to educate girls, not boys. But I want to call men out in this area, not pass the blame. There is much fatherlessness in our churches, in our homes, and in our society. There are many—countless—cases of absentee fathers, and I blame fathers! Men, it’s time to man up! It is time that we started to live the life that God, the Father, has called us to live and stop blaming everything and everyone but the person in the mirror! Men, we have a big calling with big shoes to fill. Biblical manhood and Biblical fathering are not for the faint of heart. Fatherhood is, above all else, a call to godliness, a call to priesthood, a call to leadership, and a call to take up a flag and a fight that may cause you much hardship and suffering. It is not easy to be a biblical father in a secular world. But I believe it is imperative that we—by whatever and all means necessary—begin to make the change.
It is never too late to turn to godliness, even if your children are already grown. You can begin a work of restoration and love in your children, and grandchildren. Remember, fatherhood is by God’s design, and when we go against God’s will, either by omission or commission, we are walking in sin. Your age is not an excuse.
So, you may ask where or how to begin? I would suggest you start by reading the Scriptures and taking to heart the prescriptive passages. Verses like, Deuteronomy 6:1-9, and Ephesian 6:4. You can also look to descriptive passages and see how many men in the Bible struggled greatly in their role’s as fathers, and learn from their mistakes. There is much to learn from King David and his shortcomings as a parent. I believe it is imperative to let the Scriptures be our foundation; that we look to God and His character. After all, He is our Heavenly Father. We see that He chastises His children (Hebrews 12:7), but we also see His compassion to the returning prodigal son in Luke (15:11-32).
Men, there is a place to learn how to be a father, even if yours did not teach you how to be one. I would also suggest being humble enough to ask an older man whose children are walking with the Lord to mentor you. It may feel a little humiliating, but I would rather be humbled and honor the Lord in my parenting than be prideful and fall short in my high calling. A little humility goes a long way in our world. Men, it is time to be fathers! It’s time to be fathers to our children and fathers to the fatherless. Our churches need you; our streets need you; our nation needs you.
One last note to the ladies—ladies, please honor the position of fatherhood. I want you to know that when you dishonor fatherhood you communicate to your boys that they do not matter. Please do not think that marginalizing the role of a father does not devalue your boys too, it does. It is sending a harmful message, a message which I believe has been spoken far too loud and often, and we are now seeing the repercussions. Furthermore, you are teaching your daughters that men do not matter. I could go on about this, but I just want to point back to Scripture. If you are communicating that men do not have value, you are going against God. And I would much rather stand against an entire nation, or world for that matter, than stand against my Heavenly Father.